Just a thought…

Okay, kids, I’ve had a hell of a week and I’m running on empty, so instead of incoherent babbling (which is what you’d get if I were to try to be clever right now) I’m going to do this instead.

We’re entering the holiday season. (Again, somehow. Wasn’t it just Easter?!) This can be a difficult time of year for many people for a myriad of reasons. I’m not going to be able to cover all contingencies by any stretch of the imagination, but I’ve got a couple of thoughts, anyway.

Don’t discount the traditional types of giving. Food, toy, and clothing drives, monetary donations, volunteering--these are all amazing things, and if that’s your style, DO IT. You make the world a better place for lots of people when you do this and even a little can go a long way. And you’re spoiled for choice these days about where to spread your joy. Women’s shelters, LGBTQ+ organizations, children’s hospitals, veterans charities, scholarship funds, organizations supporting people in recovery from substance abuse (shameless plug for a non-profit that owes its existence in large part to a family member of mine: https://support4recovery.org/), the list goes on and on.

That’s got people covered, right? Right. You can tick humans off your list. Now, what about our furry friends? A great number of us have pets, or enjoy animals in some capacity, so why not apply the same logic to them as we do to our fellow humans? There are plenty of shelters and rescues who need just as much help as the services for people at this time of the year. (And all the time, really. I’ll just slip in here and say that January through September don’t magically make the needs go away.) Like dogs? Find out if you can help with walks or kennel cleaning. Like cats? Drop off some catnip mice. Extra points if you made them with your small humans, and they all have wonky ears because your five year old hasn’t quite mastered the art of safety scissors! Also, there are rescues and sanctuaries for all kinds of other animals beyond Fido and Fluffy. Farm animal sanctuaries, exotic animal rescues, the works.

Like rodents as much as I do? https://raticalrodentrescue.org/

Great. We’ve got tangible needs pretty well covered, yeah? Well, now we get to the trickier stuff. We can never know everything that’s going on in the lives of the people we know. The easiest thing to do is to be kind even when you might not want to, because you have no idea what the person currently making your life a misery is going through. Everyone has a bad day once in a while. Some people have bad weeks, or months, or even years. Give the benefit of the doubt as much as possible.

If you know someone, or even think you know someone who is having a rough time or in the throes of a crisis, here’s a great resource to help you start a conversation with them.
https://makeitok.org/
https://makeitok.org/resources/

And here’s a link for the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and their support services that are local to you (US only, I’m afraid):
https://nami.org/#
https://nami.org/Find-Support

If you’re in the UK:
https://www.samaritans.org/

Or Canada:
https://thelifelinecanada.ca/help/crisis-centres/canadian-crisis-centres/

If you’re facing the possibility of spending the majority of your holidays alone, you can use #Joinin on Twitter, an online holiday party of sorts championed by UK comedian Sarah Millican.

Yes, I’m pushing the mental health agenda in part because it’s relevant to me, but also because it is often overlooked in favor of Barbies and box after box of bowtie pasta. This time of the year can be immensely suckful for people, and a lot of them feel guilty for “bringing everyone down” if they’re not all happy and excited, so they have to put on a front, which wears them down even more. Some people just disappear until after New Year’s. If you’re not comfortable trying to help a loved one wrestle their demons head-on, there are still ways you can reach out and let them know that you support them. Call. Have a movie night. Bake them a cake. (Okay, that might be me being greedy, but seriously. Cake.) Sometimes all people need is quiet companionship, or a welcome distraction.

Also hugs. But ask first unless you know the person really well.

And for those of us who struggle with rabid brain weasels throughout the year, remember that it’s okay to laugh at the situation in which you find yourself. Plenty of people do. There’s an amazing podcast about it.

https://www.hilariousworld.org/

You’ll see some familiar faces as you click through the episodes.

I’ll keep foisting this idea into your consciousness as we continue on towards the end of 2019, but it never hurts to start early.

Take care of yourselves.