Thursday, February 24, 2022

What a world...

So there was SWAT team activity outside my office the other day. 

 Our CEO popped out of his office, where he had been on a conference call with our IT director who lives in the apartments directly across the road from our office building, and proceeded to the front door while telling us there was an active shooter situation in the apartments, and he was going to lock the door. Then he got to the door, looked out, saw that the SWAT team had already arrived, and said, "Oh. Never mind. Police are here. All good."

AND NOT. A SINGLE. PERSON. IN THE OFFICE. BATTED AN EYELASH.

We're immune to it. Immune. It's so commonplace that we barely even look up anymore.

Humanity is kinda fucked up.

EDIT, 2/24 AM: Oh, look. The news. Thanks for proving my point. Jesus tits on a lawnmower. WE are why we can't have nice things.

Thursday, February 17, 2022

Some Belated Valentines

Anybody remember Teen Girl Squad? I do. Every Valentine's Day.

"Valentimes is serious times!" (A video!)

Here, have some of my favorite internet Hallmark Holiday giggles.

May be an image of text that says 'Roses are red. that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue, I have been waiting for this post all my life. They are indeed purple. But one thing you ve missed The concept of purple" Didn't always exist. Some cultures lack names For color, you see. Hence good old Homer And his wine-dark sea. A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold. So roses are red. Violets once were called blue. I'm hugely pedantic But what else is new? by u/Dja3ba' 

 King Richard III, a romantic after all these years.. : r/funny 

Okay, that one needs some explanation. Probably. King Richard III, involved in the Wars of the Roses between the houses of York (white rose) and Lancaster (red rose), killed his nephews in the Tower of London to help secure his succession to the throne, and in 2012 his actual remains were unearthed when a parking lot in Leicester was being torn up. You're welcome.

Are you alone on Valentines Day? - Jokofy Pictures 

Valentine's day | Comics 

And finally, I discovered this one this year, and it's fabulous! 

Valentine's Day Gifts from Famous Fictional Men (A very silly 'list-icle'!)

 

Thursday, February 10, 2022

Minor Annoyances

I suppose this actually started with a minor annoyance. Fitting, really.

Each year, I exchange Christmas gifts with one of my friends over in England and her family. Last year, their original parcel to me...disappeared. I am convinced that a couple hundred years from now it will be discovered behind a sorting machine in some USPS depot somewhere and they'll put its contents in a museum. The replacement (which was unnecessary but very much appreciated) arrived with minimal fuss, and contained, among other delightful items, two books.

Two children's books.

Two children's books from a series of children's books of which I already own the first four.

Pretty sure we've covered my undying love of children's literature at some point, but if you missed that bit, just accept the fact that I was so freaking excited to get my hands on these books! The last time I was able to get my arse over to England the fourth one had just been released, so I'm a little behind. These are wonderful, clever rhyme-centric books based on a simple premise--which animals are supposed to sit on what? Frogs should sit on logs, right? Wrong. Frog has no interest in sitting on a log, so he goes on a crusade to re-rhyme everyone into sitting on other things that also happen to rhyme with their species. Or name. Or some variation thereof. And his suggestions are hilarious.

Which brings me to another minor annoyance. For a long time, these books weren't widely available outside of the UK. They are a bit more easily obtained now, but the versions you can readily buy in the US have been adjusted to the vernacular, which in my humble opinion completely ruins the whole book, but never mind. Being able to get my hands on the original UK versions of the two newest installments of the series made my little bibliophile heart go all a-quiver. 

Anyway, TL;DR, I got books that are hard to get, I was happy, the end.

I should also note that as much as I love these books, the comic book my five year old nephew drew for me was by far the best part of the package. ::heart eyes::

Here, in order, for any of you who care, are the books:

Oi Frog!

Oi Dog!

Oi Cat!

Oi Duck-Billed Platypus!

Oi Puppies!

Oi Aardvark!

Thursday, February 3, 2022

Last Friday Night...

 ...was nothing like the Katy Perry song. Sorry to disappoint.

Last Friday night I drove down to Gilroy. For those of you just joining me, Gilroy is home. Home as in "where I come from" home. I lived there from age one-and-a-half or thereabouts until--legally, at least--2010, a year after I finished my Master's degree. I spent my entire childhood there, and it will always be home.

Anyway, I made the drive down. My BFF-since-we-were-three (BFFSWWT) is now an art teacher at our high school.*  There was an exhibit of the students' art at a venue downtown, at the 6th Street Studios and Art Center, which is something that has cropped up since I moved away. In fact, the whole downtown area has been revamped in the years I've been gone. When I started the fourth grade, my mother's music lesson clientele had outgrown our living room, and she moved the whole operation downtown. I started spending a great deal of time there. My mental map of the area is still eerily accurate.

At that time, the mid-nineties, downtown Gilroy existed under a sort of grimy film of neglect. That's not to say that it was a ghost town, far from it. There were plenty of businesses. It just had this...sort of dusty-layer feeling to it. That's all but gone now. There's still the odd corner of it--a storefront that hasn't been updated, the backs of some of the buildings as you go down the allies. It's still there if you know where to look. The thing about downtown in the mid-nineties was that nobody really went there unless they had to. These days, they go there because there's actually something happening. Not that there weren't plenty of "boost the profile of downtown, get people down there spending time and money" initiatives through the years, but most of them fell fairly flat. I think the thing that came closest to working was when they would close down Fifth Street for live music one night a week in the summer, but even that wasn't as much of a draw as it could have been. Now, though, there's outdoor dining and boutiques and a wine bar and a couple of clubs (newer ones--the old one, Rio Nilo, is somehow still there) and they've given the whole run of blocks between Fourth and Sixth Street on Monterey Street a facelift. It's a bit twee, if you ask me, but it seems to be working.

BFFSWWT and I spent a great deal of our evening after viewing the art display playing "Hey, wasn't that store over there before?" and "This building used to be ___", and "When did we turn into fucking Los Altos? Our community has agrarian roots, you jerk-offs!"

We had dinner at a taqueria that has been around since I was in middle school.

We got treats at the panaderia that's now in the storefront where there has and hasn't and has again been a panaderia as long as I can remember.

We took a gander at the two buildings my mom's music school occupied during her years on Monterey Street, before she finished out her tenure as director in the building at the back of the Methodist church. We differentiate the two Monterey Street locations by carpet color. The first place is the 'red carpet place', which was next to the Gaslighter, a club/performance venue where quite a few bands got their start. The address there was 7432. The second place is the 'blue carpet place', directly across the street from the red carpet place at 7423. The numbers always amused me. The red carpet place now has a sign painted on the front window that says, "Viva Con Nutricion", which I'm assuming is a vitamin shop of some sort. The blue carpet place is now the wine bar. It was a cigar store for many years, but it had been vacant and then turned into a piano showroom, of all things, when my mom moved in. The owner still displayed pianos, but Mom had the run of the place. It was a really neat building. It still had the original, high, pressed tin ceiling. The front room had a humidor built into the wall--it was a thing to behold. Enormous. So many cupboards and drawers! The wine bar knocked out the front room and has a covered patio there now. They kept the decorative glass above the doorway, though.

It was all a bit surreal, really. Not bad surreal, just...surreal. 

And then, once we had walked around and grumbled about change, BFFSWWT and I went and sat in my car so she could decorate my Boot of Shame, which I now have to wear because remember a couple of weeks ago when I tripped over my stepladder in the dark? Yeah. Severe soft tissue trauma in my left foot. Whoops. Honestly, that was the best, most enjoyable, and very much most us part of the evening. Two thirty-something women who have been friends for the majority of those thirty-something years playing with Posca pens in a parked car and being generally ridiculous. It's what we do best.

But at least my Boot of Shame is cute!


*When we were in high school, Gilroy only had one high school. There are two now. They built the second one on a flood plane. City planners are really dumb sometimes.

::does best ostrich impression::

So, I've been saying how everything is kind of a lot right now, right? I think I need to take a week or two off. I'm not in a good p...